The State of Things
On my mind: Halo 2 being the un-spectacular, un-dissapointment that it is. "Halo 2" party could have slipped into being "Halo" party with only an omitted "- 2" and I wouldn't have noticed save for the springy gun (boo) and "hide the sausage" mode (yay). This is not to say the party wasn't fun. Party=awesome. Game=awesome. Any more awesome than Halo 1? Meh.
In my car: An Eleanor of Aquitane timepeice, given to me by my loving other, which tells the time by the sun (like a portable sundial, but not the Filntstone wristwatch style) which is awesome, and a chunk of the outside of my car.
ON my car: A dent on the right side from where I scraped against a large, white van that decided it wanted to invent a lane while I was trying to make a right turn. SIGNALING. DAMMIT. Two months ago, my new car gets totaled by a drunk driver, with my girlfriend in the car (which, I don't feel less of a man by saying, scared the hell out of me), and now, two months later, I get in another accident (victim) and AGAIN she's in the car. She commented she was wearing the same underwear she wore at the time of the other accident. I am hesistant to hold that fact as the root cause.
Incidentally, all above references to "my car" could just as easily read "my grandmother's car," as I'm driving her rocket BMW since all vehicles belonging to me have exploded.
In the hot water I got to refill my tea at Denny's last night: A single, floating chunk of sausage.
On my plate: "Underground," a documentary I've been meaning to get to editing for some time now, sitting in my DV tapes, collecting magnetic impurities. "Fossil Dig Video," a practical instructional video I'm making for work (a children's science museum in Santa Ana), starring a puppet named Bovo made of two rubber ball eyes, an orange frock of muppet-mohawk, and a deer skull. The kids seem to love it. And, waiting in the darkner corners of my obligations, is this video I need to compile for my grandparents. Kind of an anniversary/this-is-your-life thing. My family loves to throw these projects at me, not knowing how much effort goes into making these things.
In my Inbox: An e-mail from my friend Caelfind (pronounced Key-lin. I know... Gaelic) telling me some changes she wants made to her wedding video I shot and edited for her. I shot the video which took about three days of shooting work in total, I edited the video in whatever free time I had, which took about six months of trying to get it done, dealing with technical problems, and finally getting it off my computer, all for only two hundred dollars, which barely covered my expenses of fixing my car after it broke down having to drive up to Crestline to film the thing in the first place. Yay.
I've returned her e-mail, explaining I have too much going on right now to continue editing the film, and that anyone else could edit it at this point just as easily as I could, which is true. Perhaps I feel a little underappreciated, perhaps my vision wasn't meant to be used in a "family video" context, but in the end I'm done working on this thing. Six months I saw nothing but an Italian Renaissance period wedding, and I'm over it. My dad asked me if they were to pay me more money, would I keep working on it. My answer; "It'd have to be a LOT of money."
That's not a joke. That's just true.
In theaters: "Saw" was another of the myriad "spooky as hell" films that was released recently. Rolling Stone reviewed it as being "gross as hell." To the fine people at Rolling Stone, I say, "Grow some goddamn balls and stop living in Victorian England. Have these people seen "Se7en" (or however the hell you spell it), "Silence of the Lambs," even "Jason Goes to Hell"? Come on, guys! This is the same thing as the public's general capricious dissatisfaction during the Clinton administration. Don't blow your wad on "Saw"! People spent Clinton's entire time in office complaining about what a bad president he was, the the country was going down faster than a Mexican at a Morrissey concert (write me letters, motherfuckers!), and that we'd never recover.
A brief history of Herr Clinton: Better international relations under his leadership than we'd had in the previous fifty years, the first time we'd had a balanced budget in the previous forty years, and a budget surplus that guaranteed a cushion of security for our national financial future.
Now, we have a president starting wars at the drop of a hat and with no nod from Congress, insulting madmen dictators with nuclear capabilities on nationwide television, putting us in the biggest deficit (trillions of dollars) we've seen since the first Depression (which still doesn't come near it), and literally restricting our rights as Americans, which is all that the concept of American really is to begin with. And now people are saying, "I don't like this president." Yeah? Well that might have meant something had you not been whining about Clinton for the first eight years, huh? I'm as against Bush as anyone else, I just don't see any credibility in bashing him when so much time was wasted bashing Clinton. Choose your battles, that's the point here.
"Saw" (yes, we're talking about "Saw," remember?) is shocking at times, definintely a taught thriller, but gross as hell it isn't. It isn't even gross as "Se7en."
Now the movie itself is a neat concept. The story is good, the cinematography is excellent, especially for its genre (cringe), and the writing isn't bad MOST of the time. What really flies this film directly into the battleship of its choice is Cary Elwes.
Now, I love this man. Apart from his role as Welsey in "The Princess Bride" (pause for cheers to subside), he's become known as the "self-assured-sensible-choice" when it comes to love interests, be it either the pitied, puppy-like Elwes in "Bram Stoker's Dracula" or the haughty, cocksure Elwes in "The Jungle Book" or "Liar Liar." People like myself may have even admired his work in lesser known films such as "The Pentagon Wars" or "Shadow of the Vampire," but the point is that the guy has his chops, and he's a great actor.
Why then, o why has he turned in this performance? As the movie builds momentum, he maintain his British situational calm, but as things get more desperate for him, he reverts into this mewling, pathetic voice that almost sounds as if he's attempting to spoof Ben Stiller's title character in "Zoolander." Sure, the writing doesn't help, but it isn't always bad, and even during the good parts Cary's struggling, so that's no excuse. It's the sign of a good actor to make bad dialogue sound good. Watch "The Musketeer." There's not one damn line in that film that's worth more than the paper it's printed on, and even then only if it's recycled. From bathroom tissue. From Afghanistan.
But you watch Tim Roth's performance in that movie. His sneering, cycloptic antagonist was fueled by nothing more than Roth and bad, bad writing, and the boy made the character sing. Hell, you wanted him to win.
Now, citing precedent, I know Elwes to be a good actor. I'm not ready to believe just yet that he's become blunted with age, nor am I prepared to hand over all the blame to really, really awful writing, as this is not the case in "Saw." I am forced to blame the director. From what I understand, the boy wrote the story of "Saw," someone else wrote the screenplay, and then he directed it. After seeing Cary's performance, I am inclined to suggest you allow someone ELSE to direct, Mr. Wan, while you attempt to corral the writers turning your awesome story (for it is an awesome story) into a poorly-written film. Maybe just get an acting advisor to be there for Mr. Elwes, mmm? Mr. Wan? Nothing to say for yourself?
Apart from the acting, and bits of the writing, "Saw" was a truly fascinating movie. It was like watching people try to work through a real-life, macabre game of Myst. Little clues, little hints, breakthroughs that dead end exactly at the point you were trying to get around. It's a lot of fun. The ending is fantastic, especially once you realize all the little hints you'd gotten throughout the movie that you were too preoccupied to notice, and the film has some truly terrifying moments in it (Pighead in the closet! PIGHEAD IN THE CLOSET!), but ultimately the poor writing and Mr. Elwes' performance brings it below the passing line. The commercials for it are bothering me now, too, just for that movie-voice at the end saying, "See 'Saw.'" See-saw. Come on, people, did that make it past marketing without anyone saying, "You know, that's going to make anyone who ever came within a hundred yards of a kindergarten playground laugh at our intentionally-frightening movie through their nose."
But that's beside the point.
Any way you look at it, be it upways, downways, sideways, or Elwes, "Saw" was so-so, and should be seen, but see "Saw" for the shooting, not solely for stagecraft.
Off my computer: Now.
I like alliteration.
In my car: An Eleanor of Aquitane timepeice, given to me by my loving other, which tells the time by the sun (like a portable sundial, but not the Filntstone wristwatch style) which is awesome, and a chunk of the outside of my car.
ON my car: A dent on the right side from where I scraped against a large, white van that decided it wanted to invent a lane while I was trying to make a right turn. SIGNALING. DAMMIT. Two months ago, my new car gets totaled by a drunk driver, with my girlfriend in the car (which, I don't feel less of a man by saying, scared the hell out of me), and now, two months later, I get in another accident (victim) and AGAIN she's in the car. She commented she was wearing the same underwear she wore at the time of the other accident. I am hesistant to hold that fact as the root cause.
Incidentally, all above references to "my car" could just as easily read "my grandmother's car," as I'm driving her rocket BMW since all vehicles belonging to me have exploded.
In the hot water I got to refill my tea at Denny's last night: A single, floating chunk of sausage.
On my plate: "Underground," a documentary I've been meaning to get to editing for some time now, sitting in my DV tapes, collecting magnetic impurities. "Fossil Dig Video," a practical instructional video I'm making for work (a children's science museum in Santa Ana), starring a puppet named Bovo made of two rubber ball eyes, an orange frock of muppet-mohawk, and a deer skull. The kids seem to love it. And, waiting in the darkner corners of my obligations, is this video I need to compile for my grandparents. Kind of an anniversary/this-is-your-life thing. My family loves to throw these projects at me, not knowing how much effort goes into making these things.
In my Inbox: An e-mail from my friend Caelfind (pronounced Key-lin. I know... Gaelic) telling me some changes she wants made to her wedding video I shot and edited for her. I shot the video which took about three days of shooting work in total, I edited the video in whatever free time I had, which took about six months of trying to get it done, dealing with technical problems, and finally getting it off my computer, all for only two hundred dollars, which barely covered my expenses of fixing my car after it broke down having to drive up to Crestline to film the thing in the first place. Yay.
I've returned her e-mail, explaining I have too much going on right now to continue editing the film, and that anyone else could edit it at this point just as easily as I could, which is true. Perhaps I feel a little underappreciated, perhaps my vision wasn't meant to be used in a "family video" context, but in the end I'm done working on this thing. Six months I saw nothing but an Italian Renaissance period wedding, and I'm over it. My dad asked me if they were to pay me more money, would I keep working on it. My answer; "It'd have to be a LOT of money."
That's not a joke. That's just true.
In theaters: "Saw" was another of the myriad "spooky as hell" films that was released recently. Rolling Stone reviewed it as being "gross as hell." To the fine people at Rolling Stone, I say, "Grow some goddamn balls and stop living in Victorian England. Have these people seen "Se7en" (or however the hell you spell it), "Silence of the Lambs," even "Jason Goes to Hell"? Come on, guys! This is the same thing as the public's general capricious dissatisfaction during the Clinton administration. Don't blow your wad on "Saw"! People spent Clinton's entire time in office complaining about what a bad president he was, the the country was going down faster than a Mexican at a Morrissey concert (write me letters, motherfuckers!), and that we'd never recover.
A brief history of Herr Clinton: Better international relations under his leadership than we'd had in the previous fifty years, the first time we'd had a balanced budget in the previous forty years, and a budget surplus that guaranteed a cushion of security for our national financial future.
Now, we have a president starting wars at the drop of a hat and with no nod from Congress, insulting madmen dictators with nuclear capabilities on nationwide television, putting us in the biggest deficit (trillions of dollars) we've seen since the first Depression (which still doesn't come near it), and literally restricting our rights as Americans, which is all that the concept of American really is to begin with. And now people are saying, "I don't like this president." Yeah? Well that might have meant something had you not been whining about Clinton for the first eight years, huh? I'm as against Bush as anyone else, I just don't see any credibility in bashing him when so much time was wasted bashing Clinton. Choose your battles, that's the point here.
"Saw" (yes, we're talking about "Saw," remember?) is shocking at times, definintely a taught thriller, but gross as hell it isn't. It isn't even gross as "Se7en."
Now the movie itself is a neat concept. The story is good, the cinematography is excellent, especially for its genre (cringe), and the writing isn't bad MOST of the time. What really flies this film directly into the battleship of its choice is Cary Elwes.
Now, I love this man. Apart from his role as Welsey in "The Princess Bride" (pause for cheers to subside), he's become known as the "self-assured-sensible-choice" when it comes to love interests, be it either the pitied, puppy-like Elwes in "Bram Stoker's Dracula" or the haughty, cocksure Elwes in "The Jungle Book" or "Liar Liar." People like myself may have even admired his work in lesser known films such as "The Pentagon Wars" or "Shadow of the Vampire," but the point is that the guy has his chops, and he's a great actor.
Why then, o why has he turned in this performance? As the movie builds momentum, he maintain his British situational calm, but as things get more desperate for him, he reverts into this mewling, pathetic voice that almost sounds as if he's attempting to spoof Ben Stiller's title character in "Zoolander." Sure, the writing doesn't help, but it isn't always bad, and even during the good parts Cary's struggling, so that's no excuse. It's the sign of a good actor to make bad dialogue sound good. Watch "The Musketeer." There's not one damn line in that film that's worth more than the paper it's printed on, and even then only if it's recycled. From bathroom tissue. From Afghanistan.
But you watch Tim Roth's performance in that movie. His sneering, cycloptic antagonist was fueled by nothing more than Roth and bad, bad writing, and the boy made the character sing. Hell, you wanted him to win.
Now, citing precedent, I know Elwes to be a good actor. I'm not ready to believe just yet that he's become blunted with age, nor am I prepared to hand over all the blame to really, really awful writing, as this is not the case in "Saw." I am forced to blame the director. From what I understand, the boy wrote the story of "Saw," someone else wrote the screenplay, and then he directed it. After seeing Cary's performance, I am inclined to suggest you allow someone ELSE to direct, Mr. Wan, while you attempt to corral the writers turning your awesome story (for it is an awesome story) into a poorly-written film. Maybe just get an acting advisor to be there for Mr. Elwes, mmm? Mr. Wan? Nothing to say for yourself?
Apart from the acting, and bits of the writing, "Saw" was a truly fascinating movie. It was like watching people try to work through a real-life, macabre game of Myst. Little clues, little hints, breakthroughs that dead end exactly at the point you were trying to get around. It's a lot of fun. The ending is fantastic, especially once you realize all the little hints you'd gotten throughout the movie that you were too preoccupied to notice, and the film has some truly terrifying moments in it (Pighead in the closet! PIGHEAD IN THE CLOSET!), but ultimately the poor writing and Mr. Elwes' performance brings it below the passing line. The commercials for it are bothering me now, too, just for that movie-voice at the end saying, "See 'Saw.'" See-saw. Come on, people, did that make it past marketing without anyone saying, "You know, that's going to make anyone who ever came within a hundred yards of a kindergarten playground laugh at our intentionally-frightening movie through their nose."
But that's beside the point.
Any way you look at it, be it upways, downways, sideways, or Elwes, "Saw" was so-so, and should be seen, but see "Saw" for the shooting, not solely for stagecraft.
Off my computer: Now.
I like alliteration.
posted by DeadLanguage at 1:35 PM
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